Therefore, we do not lose heart…..II Corinthians 4:16a
When pain comes, we often shut down our hearts, so that we don’t feel the hurt, and so that we can avoid it in the future. We become half-hearted. But when we lose heart, we lose life and joy in living. We don’t consciously make this choice; we just react. In the book “Strong Women, Soft Hearts” by Paula Rinehart she puts in black and white how we lose heart. I wish I had seen this sooner in my life, before I got to the dry and weary place of cynicism and hopelessness. Maybe that’s where you are right now. Here is what not to do:
How do we lose heart?
1) We play it safe, we hide…sometimes the best parts of ourselves, or the unique way God made us. We edit and downplay anything that might get rejected. By doing this, we lose a sense of who we are. We play a role, rather than really live. (What is it about you that you try to hide or minimize?)
2) We refuse to hope, so we push away life. We close the door on our own fingers. We sabotage ourselves. It leads to a distorted view of God, because we make statements about God in those places of disappointment. (He doesn’t care; He’s disgusted with me, this is hopeless, etc) It pushes us in another direction (trusting ourselves or others). It keeps us from seeing the good things in our lives.
3) We live by inner vows (statements we’ve made to protect ourselves). “Vows are rules we make as a result of pain that shape our behavior in the future.” Things like “I’m never going to need anybody again.” “It’s always my fault.” “I will not trust others to be there for me.” These vows often lead to the behavior that later becomes a vicious cycle. They also lead to a great deal of fear in our lives.
We must not lose heart; that causes a loss of hope. But hope that is pinned to God, resting in His goodness, is a hope that helps us to stay alive to the possibility of good in our lives, though circumstances may not look the way we pictured. It’s a sense of expectancy rooted in God’s character, God’s promises, and God’s unfailing love.
*What’s a lie or statement that you tend to repeat when pain or disappointment comes? What truth does God want you to claim and cling to?
Father God, I humble myself before you. When I make a choice to give up on hope, it must appear that I’m stubbornly refusing anything but what I pictured. I want You to have Your way in my life, in my story, in my hurts, my hopes and my dreams. I know that You are a good, good Father. So I stand by faith, saved by grace, equipped by Your promises, empowered by Your Spirit. I will pray boldly and expectantly, trusting You completely! In Your powerful, matchless name I pray, Amen.
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