For you have been called to live in freedom—not freedom to satisfy your sinful nature, but freedom to serve on another in love.  Galatians 5:13

     Gary Smalley  (“I Promise”) says that the family he grew up in instilled in him (mostly by example) that life is for pleasure and gratification—hunting, fishing, gambling, vacations, etc.  And while after he became a Christian, he understood that we are called to serve others, it never occurred to him that he served with an expectation of return.

     Then he read our verse for today and asked himself: could committing himself to unselfish service to others could change a habit such as lust? He began to memorize this verse and to focus on serving others through love, rather than focusing on the selfishness of lustful thoughts. Within two weeks of memorizing this verse and repeating it back to God from morning till night, lustful thoughts began to disappear.

     Then be began to realize that he served in ministry situations but not so much at his home. At home he had placed himself at the center of the universe and expected the rest of the family to orbit around him. (This was not conscious, of course.)

     One day his wife confronted him, and said he had not made her a priority. He promised her that from that moment on, she was on the top of his list. He writes: “On my way back to work, I realized that my life was now over. I was dead. I wanted to call her back and renege on my promise, but by the power of God, I did it. Every morning I got up looking for ways to serve my wife—to put her first. That day started a whole new life for both of us. I broke through the barrier of self-centeredness and began developing new beliefs about serving others instead of using others. “

     Serving truly is dying—dying to self and to selfishness. How did Christ love us? By laying down His life.  My flesh says, “If I do this, I won’t be happy and everyone will take advantage of me.” Gary Smalley says that the only way to understand that serving others does make you happy is to try it. But you can’t do it expecting anything in return—even appreciation. (The people around you will probably act suspicious at first, assuming you have a motive.)

     Smalley concludes, “If you want to be free from your lustful desires, focus on serving others. If you want a happy marriage, don’t focus on being happy; focus on being like Christ. Jesus was a servant. Serve your mate, serve others selflessly, and you will find happiness. My goal is no longer to be a great husband; it’s to be a great servant. Great servants make great marriages.”

*What is one small thing you could do to begin serving?

God, everything in me resists this being a servant idea. It just feels like taking on another parttime job. It’s also hard to overcome the resentment that rises up when I hope that it will be reciprocated. However, as I look at Christ and His lavish love, I know that He was a servant. Lord, love through me as I obey You a day at a time—by faith and with Your enabling grace. In Your name, Amen.


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