A word fitly spoken and in due season is like apples of gold in settings of silver.  Proverbs 25:11 (Amplified Bible)

In the book The Five People You Meet in Heaven, Mitch Albom tells the story of a man named Eddie who dies thinking his life is meaningless. He finds out, thanks to the five people he meets in heaven, that he was wrong--that his life was purposeful and heroic in ways that he never knew. Mitch Albom says, “I had an Uncle Eddie, and I realize I have never met anyone as magical as he seemed to me as a boy. He should have known that. I wish I had told him.” His message is that people should tell those around them that they matter. Perhaps there is a person in your life—a friend, family member, colleague, teacher or mentor—who may not know how deeply he or she has touched and influenced you.

            As we think about communicating with others, the phrase, “words fitly spoken and in due season” also go to timing and presentation. In all my years of marriage and trying to relate my thoughts and ideas to other people, I have leaned that finding the right time to say something makes a world of difference. It is usually a good idea to wait until you have had time to think things through—maybe even sleep on them first—before you share with someone a thought that may be hard for them to hear.

 I have also learned to “come in the back door.” (I used to just “aim and fire.”) Now I realize that the way I say it is just as important as what I’m saying.  I need to sandwich my thoughts between affirming and kind words. I want to “build a bridge, not a case.”  Life coach, Tommy Newberry, says to ask yourself:

 1) What is my goal here?

 2) What outcome do I want in this situation?

 3)Will the words I am choosing move me in the direction I want?

*Is there anyone who needs to hear that they matter to you?

*What will you do to let people know that you appreciate them?

*Write down these three questions and review them regularly, so that your encounters with people will line up with your true desires for your relationships.

Jesus, since you walked on this earth, You know how overwhelming relationships can be. I need Your wisdom and Your help. I want my words to be like apples of gold in settings of silver—a beautiful presentation of thoughts that will help and strengthen. Give me grace to think and pray first before I say difficult things. You are a great help in time of need. Thank You. Amen.

The Way Counseling
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